It's known as "conversion therapy", and you're right, it doesn't work. You need to align your body with your brain, not the other way around. Your subconscious sex* is female, so you want to take estrogen, not testosterone. Don't listen to people who try to talk you out of being the woman you know that you are.

* I learned this term from Julia Serano's book "Whipping Girl", which, along with her other writing, I highly recommend.