Five years in transition
Does it get better?
Five years ago today, I announced my new name and non-binary gender identity to the world. While there have been many milestones in my gender transition, my nameday is the most significant, as its timing and execution were entirely under my own control. The medical and legal interventions would come later, but neither of those impacted or represented who I was inside — a revelation that took me until middle age to discover.
Choosing a new name was of great importance and significance to me. I wanted a name that was both gender-neutral and personally meaningful. Unlike many trans people, I changed my entire name — first, middle, and last:
Pax is Latin for peace.
Ahimsa is Sanskrit for “do no harm”.
Gethen is a fictional planet of androgynes from Ursula K. Le Guin’s book The Left Hand of Darkness.
I would have made Ahimsa my first name, but I knew it would be difficult to spell and pronounce. I didn’t think Pax would be problematic in either of those respects, but soon found that unless I enunciate very clearly, people often think I’m saying “Max” or “Pat”. I’ve taken to immediately spelling the name and flashing a peace sign so that people get it.
